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Restless and Discontent

Newcomers move here, are excited, usually have an exhilarating job awaiting them, or a business they are launching here, they head to work devoted to learning their new job or are excitingly starting the process of introducing their business.  After work they are unpacking and enjoying a nice evening at home – alone.  They repeat the process for about 6 months.  No biggie.  After that…as I understand it they can become restless and discontent!

Two days ago I got on the phone to visit with a gal about serving on our advisory board at TalkoftheTownNWA.com. What I said to her and what I’ll say to you today is this…

After approximately 6 months the Newcomer has the job down pat, is rocking and rolling, the apartment or home is in TIP TOP shape but they find themselves just sitting there again – some more – every single night and even weekends.

Okay, maybe they are brave and will take in a movie or two by themselves (no biggie), go it alone to a 1st Friday event or stroll the streets of a great farmers market – and it works for a bit.  Maybe even hang out with work buddies yet after awhile you miss having your own tribe.  I’m not sure what I’d do without my tribe of trusted friends that love me no matter what.  That tribe!  After about 6 months of not making real connections, not finding their tribe in Northwest Arkansas – they become restless and discontent.

Then they’ll SECRETLY start examining job options elsewhere – options that lead them to a bigger city, a more social atmosphere, people their age, even moving back to their home town, etc.  By the time – a year rolls around – they are out.  I should have capitalized that – THEY ARE OUT!  Retention and connection is a challenge in Northwest Arkansas and it is our responsibility to improve upon this – yours and mine.

My business friend said, “Oh my gosh – just last week we held a women’s retreat offsite from work and a beautiful black woman (that’s been with us for about a year); actually started crying and said she can’t get connected here.  Our company takes care of the executives pretty well yet everyone else is on their own – really.”

I said, “That’s what I’m talking about – I can tell you right now – within a week and a few phone calls I could have anywhere from 3-5 beautiful black women together for coffee or tea in support of your co-worker!  And further she’d know that if she showed up to Newcomer Receptions because we talk about it there.”

I get off the phone and turned right around and called one of my beautiful black business friends to get her opinion on a variety of different things… 1) is it okay for me to say beautiful black woman?  She said, yes. The politically correct way is African American woman yet who’s not okay with being referred to as beautiful black woman (we both giggled)  2) would you be willing to meet for coffee or tea if called upon?  She said, yes of course.  I ask her to send her impression of Newcomer Receptions, her take away and what she recommends regarding connections in Northwest Arkansas.

Carla shared this – “How I wish the Newcomers Reception would have been here 20 years ago.  As I too moved into this area with BIG DREAMS and HIGH HOPES only to find myself internally empty due to no connectivity. After trying to fit in here or there, I found the SECRET…….I took off my mask and stopped pretending to be this or that for acceptability.  I am unique, I am me and I belong!  The Newcomer Receptions are a benefit to people and to our community. It’s a real program for people who are tired of their mask.”

Carla Thompson (follow Divine Diva on FB: Designed Divine DIVA )

Divine DIVA, Founder

Author (I Believe I Am | Devotional Journal) & Life Coach

 

 

I talked one more of my beautiful black business friends and she sent this…Love these gals!

“The Newcomers Reception is crucial for African American Women coming into the Northwest Arkansas area. Not only will you be connected to like minded people who are genuinely open to helping you flourish in the area, but you will also be able to connect with other minorities.

Being an African American female in Northwest Arkansas has been hard, but the support I’ve gain from the Newcomer Receptions (yes I’ve attended often) has really propelled me in life and in business.”

Krystal Beachum, Author | For The Other 98% | The Ultimate Guide for Student-Athletes to Go Pro in Entrepreneurship

I hope you’ll pass this around, share and share some more because what we desire to be at TalkoftheTownNWA.com  – is a liaison to your Company by furnishing complimentary tickets for you to GIFT to new hires, a liaison to the people of Northwest Arkansas, especially Newcomers moving here…

The truth is – the struggling Newcomer is NOT going to go into HR and say, “I’m really struggling – I can’t get connected here!”  However, if HR departments will make sure all new employees know about our complimentary Newcomer Reception (remember, we provide complimentary tickets for your company to gift to new employees); Newcomers will have supportive information and also our 7 Sacred Secrets to Getting Connected in Northwest Arkansas that we share at Newcomer Receptions, along with meeting some great people.

Then they will know…they have options and can reach out for help.

Real change starts now.  And it starts by being proactive.  Unfolding your arms and embracing a bigger vision – is important.  Your share makes a difference here, your business listing makes a difference, HR and management in our corporate and business offices, simply being open and sharing about Newcomer Receptions makes a difference, realtors make a huge difference by giving complimentary tickets, personally showing up to help host newcomers at Newcomer Receptions makes a huge difference – opening up your mind, getting out of self, taking action makes a HUGE difference.

The action we would like for you to take today as you read this is to truly PUT PEOPLE FIRST, think of “the person struggling” – first – and email, call or text today and ask “how can I help?”  That would make a difference.

Hospitality – it is time and everyone needs to find a way to contribute to the bigger picture – which is connection and honor within “our” Northwest Arkansas – yours and mine.

With much gratitude,

Theresa | Founder | TalkoftheTownNWA.com | 479.633.GROW (4769)

Newcomer Receptions | a community event where leaders, business professionals & loyal locals gather to welcome those NEW to our region!  Details & RSVP information: TalkoftheTownNWA.com/newcomer

Newcomers Guide to Northwest Arkasnas

Appalled, Shocked and Dismayed in Northwest Arkansas

Last year I met a newcomer that is what “she described herself as” a white woman yet of Hispanic decent; when we first met I believe she had been in Northwest Arkansas less than six months – and – she was appalled, horrified, shocked, dismayed, stressed and outraged.  I noticed it on twitter and reached out to her…

If you’re reading this – we (you and I) have more work to do in this community – our – Northwest Arkansas.  There’s a lot to be done regarding Newcomer support in Northwest Arkansas!

Being from San Diego landing here in Northwest Arkansas was culture shock as she described it and as many describe it.  The challenges had to do with overhearing many people speak in a derogatory way about her Hispanic culture – remember – she’s looks white and many spoke freely in her presence , other challenges included big trucks, rebel flags, terrible driving and traffic situations to mention a few.

I chose to spotlight her story at Newcomer Reception – in the raw.  I was and am truly grateful she was willing to be so brave and again really vulnerable in a public venue like our Newcomer Receptions.  Following her brave heartfelt share she handed back the microphone and my only words were…I’m so sorry this has happened to you here and that it has caused you to hurt.  Then I turned to the audience and said, “When we know better – we can do better!”

Later that next week we met for coffee and let me say “being heard” is so incredibly powerful because she seemed softer and I encouraged her to seek and focus on things she loves here.  Today she is a vibrant community leader and a loving, caring, beautiful woman, wife, bonus mom, friend, neighbor and professional – yes she got back to her true foundational core.

Together – we can do more.  I don’t want to come across as NWA fairy Godmother or anything yet – the work we do at TalkoftheTownNWA.com is very important.  Further we need your support to keep going, growing and making a difference.

I was inspired to write this today because yesterday I got off the phone after hearing the shared story of a beautiful black woman that has been here a year and found herself in tears at an offsite work meeting.  She broke down and cried because she hasn’t been able to connect here in Northwest Arkansas.

Look for that article next (link at bottom of page) and learn more about what is possible if the Newcomer just knew we we’re available on such a personal level.  Not everyone needs support – many do great.  If you’re a newcomer and struggling pick up the phone and call us 479.633.GROW (4769) or attend a Newcomer Reception then we’ll have a tea or coffee later.  A sit down visit (smile).

Please share both of these articles so businesses, services and HR departments can better understand the void we fill.  We are able to make a huge difference in this community as connectors, consultants, coaches, mentors and more…  Support, retention and connection is our amazing gift to this community by means of TalkoftheTownNWA.com and the work we do as a service and the individual attention and conversations we are willing to have with Newcomers is powerful in our growing region.

Day before yesterday I called a client who works for a prominent supplier in Northwest Arkansas.  The conversation took a spin about a beautiful black woman struggling to get connected in Northwest Arkansas…click to read full story

With much gratitude,

Theresa | Chief Inspirational Office | TalkoftheTownNWA.com | 479.633.GROW (4769)